A
Plain and Practical 
DISCOVERY 
Of the Nature and Cause of the 
SECRET DISEASE. 
WITH 
A Short, far more Private, Easy, and Compendious 
Method of its Cure than any hitherto Extant.
To which Is Appended, 
The Grand Impostor Discover'd. 
Being REMARKS upon the Practical and Phi- 
losophical Scheme of the Secret Disease: Where- 
in is made appear, by undeniable Demonstration, 
the Insufficiency of that Author's Royal Specifick, 
(which is Sold at Mr. Pratt's, at the Angel in Corn- 
hill; and at Mr. Barnett's, a Perfumer, over- 
against the Hay-Market) to perform any Radi- 
cal Cure, &c.
BY S. T. M. D
This Book is given away Gratis to any One that 
will but ask for it, at Mr. Lovell's, a Toy-Shop, 
over-against Great Suffolk-Street End near the 
Hay-Market, by Pall-Mall; and at Mr. Jeremiah 
Pains, a Toy-Shop, at the Bunch of Grapes in 
Popes-Head-Alley, over-against the Royal-Ex- 
change, Cornhill. 




(3)
A 
Plain and Practical Discovery 
OF 
The Nature and Cause 
OF THE 
Secret Disease, 
THE Author’s Design in the following Tracts 
being chiefly to instruct the Judgment;
does therefore hope the Reader will Ex- 
cuse his Exceeding plainness through the 
whole, and fix your Eyes on the Argument; 
the height of his Ambition being to 
Write, Non diserta sed fortia, Not to tickle the Fancy, 
or to feast the Eyes or Ears, with fine Phrases and ele- 
gant Expressions; but throughly to convince the Judg- 
ment: This is his Design, but how performed, he must 
leave to the Determination of the impartial Reader. 
He does not question, but so soon as it shall show its 
self to the World; it will meet with a great many Ad- 
versaries; but this is his comfort, that the greatest noise 
will come from the Empty, Carping Momuses of the Age,
who like paltry Curr's will be Snarling at the Horse 
Heels; because they cannot reach the Rider: And to 
expect a fair Treatment from such is down right ridicu- 
lous, and as he experts not, so he desires not their favour. 
For 
Frustum ab Insipidis petere, Insipientia est. 
A2 Is

(4)
Is a truth Plautus hath long since determined. And 
therefore if any shall oppose him with Scurrility, he 
will answer them with contempt. For 
Irrita Vaniloquœ quid Curas Spicula Linguœ? 
Latrantem Curatne Alta Diana Canem? 
As to the Learned and Judicious, if any such shall 
condescend to peruse this small Tract. The Author's Ad- 
dress to him shall be in the Words of the Poet
—Laudatus Abunde, 
Non Fastiditus si tibi Lector ero. 
To Answer my proposed brevity; I've here given you 
a short and compendious Account of the Secret Disease, 
as also of the Several Gradations or Advances it makes 
upon the Microcosm, or little World, Man, when once 
infected; and likewise some of the more Ordinary Symp-
tomes whereby it begins to show it self; then I've given 
you a brief Account of Specificks in General, and of the 
Power and Efficacy of my own Specifick for the Secret 
Disease in particular; but the Method of Cure being 
more proper to be incerted, in the book of private Di- 
rections, seal'd up with my Specifick Medicines (Sold at 
Mr. Lovell's a Toy Shop over-against Great-Suffolk-Street- 
End near the Hay-Market, Pall-Mall; and at Mr. Fere- 
miah Pain's Toy-Shop at the Bunch of Grapes in Popes- 
Head-Alley over-against the Royal-Exchange, Cornhill;) 
I therefore omit them Here. 
PERHAPS the Reader will say I'm, to harsh, Satyri- 
cal and particular in my Remarks upon the Author of 
the Practical and Philosophical Scheme, &c. but let me 
tell you (sub Rosa) considering the Horridness of his 
Crimes, and to prevent my Countrymen, for the future, 
from being imposed upon, by any such Invader of the 
Common Wealth of learning, it was impossible for me 
(without being guilty of partiality) to put it in a milder 
Dress.
CHAP- 


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CHAP. I 
Of the Nature and Cause of the Secret Disease. 
I Shall not try my Readers Patience, with a long and 
Tedious Repetition, of the many and various Opi- 
nions, Numerous Appellations, original Climes, &c. that 
the Ancients, as well as Moderns, by their Indefatigable 
Study and Learned Lucubrations, have made on the first 
Rise, Nature and cause of this Disease; which when 
known, would be of no Use or Advantage, nor make 
the Patient either wiser or better in his Cure. I shall 
therefore, with all the brevity and perspicuity Imagina- 
ble, Lay before the Reader what shall be most necessary 
for the perfectly understanding his own Case, and the 
more Effectually and Expeditiously Curing himself; and 
therefore I conceive, it will be sufficient, to take no- 
tice of the common Means, Concomitants, Accidents, 
and various Circumstances, wherewith this Disease is 
generally attended. 
The Names by which it is commonly known are, Lues 
Venerea, the Venereal or Secret Disease; which is Occasion- 
ed (tho’ not always) by a promiscuous Mixture of Dif- 
ferent Company, and contrary Species of Seeds in One, 
and the same Woman, through the Activity of Spirits 
and the Volatile Salts with which the different Seeds 
abound; does fo rarifie and ferment in the Womb, as 
to produce a change of Figure, Texture and Cohæsion of 
the Parts; from whence it becomes a Corrupt Body and 
Acid. Corruption according to the common acceptation 
is derived from the Latin Word Corrumpo, quast, a Con 
& Rumpo, is nothing else but a breaking of the Shape, 
Figure, Texture and Cohæsion of the Parts, which are 
Globular, Smooth, and Flat, in all found Bodies; but 
by change, they become Rugged, Sharp Pointed, Ragged 
and Shattered. Fermentation is a rare Faction excited and 
Acted by the Heat and Air, penetrating into the Pore 
of the Texture, figure and Cohæsion of broken Mixed 
corrupt Bodies, Rarifying the Volatile Salts therein, 
it sets the Sulphurious and Oily particles into Motion, and
A4 so

(6)
so occasions a Fermentation, and then a stinking Putrifacti- 
on, and as all Bodies are more or lets such, as their Corrup- 
tion is from more or less perfect things, it’s no Wonder 
then that (from the Corruption of a Matter so refined 
and pure as humane Seed is) the very worst of all Distem- 
pers shou’d proceed. 
There are several other ways (which many from Woful 
Experience can attest) by which the Malign penetra- 
tive particles of this Infection, may be transmitted from 
any part of an infected Person, into the Cuticular Pores 
of any part of a found Body; for no sooner 'tis through 
these Pores, than it meets with some of the Fluids of 
the Body, which Viciates, and by further fermentation, 
converts into a Virus of its own Nature. 
But that every Person, may be fully Satisfied here- 
in, how and by what means Persons do so often be- 
come Infected with this Disease I shall hereto Subjoyne 
a particular Account of some other Occasions of this 
Infection. 
Altho’ more Persons do receive this Infection by the 
Venereal Injoyment of an infected Companion, than 
by all other ways whatsoever; yet dear bought Experi- 
ence to many, tells us that its often got by a lustful Dal- 
liance with the Obscene Parts of an infected Woman, 
and a Man may give it to a found Woman (if he has 
a Violent Gonorrhea, Shankers, &c. although he has 
not enter’d her Body. 
This may also be receiv'd by Lasciviously Killing any 
one, who has Venereal Ulcers or Sores in his or her Mouth 
or Throat; as also by lying in the same Bed for any Con- 
siderable time with any Person (tho' of the same Sex) 
that has the Venereal Disease in a high degree; will com- 
municate the Infection to a found Person, so likewise 
will any Garment worn by a Person severely Poxt, give 
it to a found Person, which by its infectious Effluvia's 
enters most parts of the Body, and fixes in the Miliary 
Glands; and occasions unusual Itchings, Tinglings, and 
little breakings out in the Skin, not soon to be Cured. 
A great many Infants bring this Disease with them 
into the World; their Parents being Poxt, and although 
at their Birth they may be seemingly Clean and Sound, 
yet they will soon discover their Disease by unusual
breaking

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breakings out, &c. and those Infants thus Infected, of- 
tentimes gives this Disease to their Nurses, both by be- 
ing Suckled, Kiss’d and Fondled by them; Nurses thus 
Infected, has likewise given it to found Children (and 
tho’ without their knowledge) they have likewise In- 
fected their Husbands from all which it appears what 
Caution Parents of found Children ought to take in 
giving their Children to be Suckled by found Nurses, 
or fondled by found Nursery Maids, also Nurses ought 
to take Care what Infants they take to Nurse. 
There are diverse other Brutish ways, by which this 
Disease may be Propagated; but I shall neither here de- 
file my Readers Ears nor try his Patience with reciting 
them, but shall refer them to consider under what Degree 
their infection is Comprehended and accordingly their 
Cure. 
CHAP. II. 
Of the Third different Gradations of the Secret Disease. 
Grad. 1st. THE Conjunction of the two contrary 
Species, Man and Woman, whose Coi- 
tion is not improperly said to be Vicious and Impure 
when either of them first Infected, communicates to the 
other, the Malignity of the Distemper, by the very 
Action; the Parts at that time being turgid, dilated, 
and distended; with vigorous Blood and Animal Spirits, 
by which their Pores are more than usually open’d; and 
the Air within the Tube or Urinary Passage is so rarifyed, 
that no sooner the Seed is Ejected, and the Air that re- 
mained in the Urethra, thrown out, but Immediately 
through the weight and Elasticity of the External Air 
it rushes in again, Loaded with Venereal Steams, and,
Enters into all the Cavity's of the Parts of both. The 
Corrupted Matter being thus inwardly received, in a 
short time (like all other Corrosives whose Particles are 
Sharp, pointed and Ragged) it so frets, corrodes, cor- 
rupts, exulcerates and excoriates whatever Parts or Pores 
it has Entered or touch’d; so as to cause a tenderness.
A4 heat

(8)
heat, redness, Itching, Inflamation, with Superficial lit- 
tle Pustules, Weals, Blisters, and small Ulcers; which 
Occasions that insupportable Pain commonly (tho’ most 
Improperly) called heat of Urine; The Urine being 
no hotter then, than at other times, but the Passage 
being full of those little Blisters and Ulcers, becomes 
Raw and Sore, and of consequence is fretted by the Acid, 
and Saline Nature of the Urine, which Smarts and seems 
to Burn and Scald, as it goes thro’; Just so will any 
Sore or Raw Place Smart if you put Urine upon it: It 
as likewise Attended with a gentle Running of Putrid 
Matter, that Drips and Owze away and appears like 
clammy Drops, upon Squeezing the Parts; any Infection 
of this kind, may properly enough be called a Luminary 
Clap; it being no other than a Superficial Ulcer or a 
local Injury, adhering only to the Parts first Infected, 
and may therefore be cured mostly by External Ap- 
plications, and good Advice. 
Grad. 2. The aforesaid venomous corrupted Matter, 
still increasing, and creeping more and more down the 
Passage, it Eats in and thro the capillary ends of the 
Lacteal Veins, and Lymphatick Vessels, Insinuating its 
self amonst the Salubrious Juices, and throwing it self 
into the Blood, corrupts the whole Mass, upon which, 
the Body breaks out into Blotches, Boils, and Ulcers;
by reason the parts having lost their retentive faculty, 
it is therefore attended with a virulent Running, and 
frequently with Swellings in the Groins, and Testicles, 
as also Contraction, of the Frœnum or Bridle in Men, 
causing great pain, Especially when hot in Bed. Thus 
much for the Second Gradation or Degree. 
Grad. 3. When the aforementioned Symptoms are not 
remedied, by a timely Application, for an effectual Cure; 
then the Malignity of the Distemper, by a longer Conti- 
nuation, still Increases; and the acid Humour being more 
subtle and penetrating, insinuates and settles it self into 
every Part of the Body, and by its most violent Acidity, 
it gnaws and eats thro’ the Tendons, Nerves, Gristles, 
and Bones, causing them to Putrify and Rot; And of Con- 
sequence separate from the good Part, and comes away. 
This Degree is generally attended with these dismal Con- 
sequences, viz. A shortness and stinking of Breath, hot 
and

(9)
and sore Eyes, gnawing Pains, consumptive Coughs, 
Phthisick, Hoarseness, Vertigo, &c. and then the Disease 
looses it former Name of a Clap, and commences that 
of a Pox; which is the Third Degree of this Disease. 
CHAP. III. 
Of the several Symptoms whereby this Disease does usually 
discover it self.
AS there is a real Distinction, (obvious even to the 
meanest Capacity’s) in the Lineaments, Features, 
and composure of every Face whereby they may be di-
stinguished one from another. So the Humours and 
Constitutions of their Bodies are as Various, and its 
Symptoms as Multifarious; it would prove an endless 
Task, to give a particular Enumeration, of the different 
and innumerable Symptoms, by which, this Disease first 
discovers it self, upon the Bodies of Men, and Women: 
I shall only at present, take Notice of these more obvious 
and common Symptoms; from whence, I am satisfied any 
Person may discern whether they are Infected or not, 
If the Person injured, has got it by Coition, then it 
usually discovers it self, in a few Days, at most in a Week’s 
time, by an unusual, tho’ slight Pain, and rouling of the 
Testicles, an Heat, and pricking Pain in the Urinary Pas- 
sage, especially towards the Prepuce or End, attended 
with a Tenderness in the sore Skin, tho’ not discernable, 
unless you squeeze the Yard; it is also attended with an 
Inclination, often to make Water, which is followed by a 
furrowing up of the Urinary Passage, and then a small 
Gleet or Owzing, which at first appears like the white of 
a raw Egg, but shortly after changes into a Greenish or 
Yellowish Colour. 
In others, when the Infection has been more severe, it 
appears by an extream Heat of Urine, painful Erections, 
whereby the Nut of the Yard becomes sore, by reason of 
the contraction of the Frænum or Bridle, and is a 
Cordee.  
In some, it commences with a vehement, and insup- 
portable Pain of the Head, as also extream Pains in the
Arms

(10)
Arms, Shin-bones, and Shoulders, &c. and that for a 
considerable Time before it displays it self any other way. 
In some Persons, where the Infection has been more 
malignant, it comes with a virulent Running of the 
Reins, or in the Secret Parts, with an extream Heat, and 
sealding of Urine, &c.
In others, it begins with a Stiffness and Pains in the 
Joynts, and Limbs, attended with a Soreness in the Eyes, 
and a great Weakness. 
In many Persons, after a short time Running, one or 
both the Testicles are swelled and Painful, and then the 
Running commonly ceases, by reason the corrupt Matter 
that should flow away, precipitates thither, occasions cold 
Shivering, Faintness, and sick Qualmes, &c. but as these 
Fits abate, commonly the Running return again. 
In some it appears with an involuntary flowing out 
of Corrupted Matter, without any pain or Uneasiness 
at all. 
Some Persons take it with a Debility in the Joints and 
Limbs, a dulness of the Spirits, Heaviness, Melancholly, 
foreness in the Throat, and a great heat in the Palms of 
the Hands, &c. 
In Women it is usually attended with a Running, 
which they generally overlook, by taking it for the 
Whites, till (and that sometimes too late) they are un- 
deceived, by it Super-abundance and Increase in quantity, 
change of Colour, attended with smarting and pricking 
Pains in making Water; and sometimes an Inflamation 
and Soreness, &c. in and about the Privity's with which 
Symptoms, they are not so soon afflicted as Men, nor 
usually with so great Severity; yet are more difficult than 
Men to be Cured. And in some Men, as well as Wo- 
men; where their Constitutions are very Strong and 
Healthy, and the Infections slight; the Symptoms are so 
very Mild, as not to be taken notice of. 
These are some or the more usualy Symptoms, by 
which this Disease commonly displays it self in the be-
ginning of the Infection; both in Men and Women, 
but does commonly Vary, according to the difference in 
the Temperaments and Constitutions of each Body; or 
as the Degree of Infection, has been more or less Severe; 
and Malignant in the Party Infecting; and therefore it
will

(11)
will show it self in some Men in Three or Four Days, 
which in Others will not appear in almost as many Weeks 
or Months, but it would be a difficult Task to Ac- 
count for all the Variety of Symptoms, that Venereal 
Patients, according to their Age, Sex, different Habits 
of Body, Malignity of the Infection, Way of Receiving, 
&c. are afflifted with; let these already recited ; suf- 
fice. 
CHAP. IV. 
Of Specificks in general, and the Authors in particular. 
IT’s acknowledg’d by all Searchers in the Mysteries of
Nature, That all things in this World (one excepted) 
are specified, every Individual (at the Command of the 
Eternal Fiat) assuming its particular Form, and arising 
out of that Chaos, or universal Matter, which contain’d 
all Things in Potentia, before they were brought into 
Act: All Beings were, no doubt, (by the Eternal Pur- 
pose of God) determined to the particular Uses and 
Ends for which they were created; of which, Adam, 
whilst in a State of Innocence, had a clear and intuitive 
Knowledge; but, by forfeiting his Integrity, Sin was in- 
troduced into the World, and as a Consequence thereto, 
those innumerable Miseries, and complicated Diseases, 
(we Daily undergo) were entail’d by him upon all his 
Posterity: And the remedying of which, the Mist of 
Sin being before Men’s Eyes, they have ever since grop’d 
and stumbled in the Dark, being denuded and deprived 
of that Knowledge, by which they might discover the 
Use and End for which every thing was intended. 
And altho’ Solomon (by a supernatural and divine In- 
spiration) knew the Use and Virtue of every Plant, from 
the Cedar in Lebanon, to the Hyssop on the Wall, and 
consequently the several Diseaes for which they were 
specified and adapted; yet are we at an unspeakable Loss 
since these his Writings are not to be found. It is ne- 
vertheless not to be Denied, but that a great many Learned 
Men, Ancients as well as Moderns, by their strict En-
quiry

[12]
quiry into the Secrets of Nature, have found out, and been 
Matters of many Specifick Medicines, (witness Paracelsus, 
Helmont, Riverius, Sydenham, Boyle, and many others) 
whereby they almost wrought Miracles in the Cure of Di- 
seases: In search of which Mysteries, I have in my Pra- 
ctice of Physick and Chymistry, found out and discover’d 
several Specificks, by which I have wrought extraordinary 
Cures, especially on this Disease, which is the Bane of 
Mankind, by Vertue of my Specifick, which I may be 
bold (without an Hyperbole) to say, is the only Specifick 
in the World, and will Answer that which others only 
pretend to, especiaily One who has Imposed upon this 
Nation, this two Years past, by Making a great Noise and 
Bustle about his Royal Specifick Grain, the Insignificancy 
and Inability of both it and its Author, to perform any 
radical Cure, I have, I hope made appear in the latter 
part of this Book. 
It is of very small Importance to the afflicted Patient, 
to detain him from his Cure, by a long and tedious dif- 
course of the Power and Efficacy of my Specifick, and 
its way of Operation, as also my Method of Cure; 
which is more proper for the inside Directions that are 
Seal’d up with the Specifick to which I refer him, let 
it suffice, that it is of that Singular Nature, to encoun- 
ter with the Morbifick Matter, and expell the Venereal 
Contagion, causing a Separation ot the vitious Humours 
From the others; working by all Cathartick, Diapho- 
retick, and Diuretick Ways, without Vomiting (or 
Nauseousness) which would be very Pernicious to the 
Patient. 
It is most Easie, Pallatable, and Pleasant, and may be 
taken with much more Privacy than can be imagined, 
containing all things Necessary, for what ever Stage or 
Degree of the Malignity you are under without hind- 
rance of Business, or Confinement to any Particular 
Diet; neither shall I send you to Chymists, Apothecaries, 
Surgeons, &c. for Diet-Drinks, Unguents, Diureticks, 
and a Thousand such Slip-Slops, Prescribed by these Emp- 
ty Medicine-Mongers, the Purchasing of which arises 
usually to more Money than the Prime charge of their 
Insignificant Specifick.
This

(13)
This my Specifick, with particular Directions for every 
Degree of the Distemper, lies Sealed up at Mr. Lovel's 
a Toy-Shop over-against great Suffolk-Street-End, near 
the Hay-Market, Pall-Mall; and at Mr. Feremiah 
Pain's, a Toy-Shop at the Bunch of Grapes in Popes- 
Head-Alley over-against the Royal Exchange, Cornhill, 
and no where else: Price 1 Guinea, the Coat of Arms 
on the Specifick, agrees with that on the Title Page of 
this Book. Where are also to be had the following 
Specificks, every one of which will Answer the End,, for 
which they are proposed. 
Imprimis. My Specifick Elixir, causing safe and 
speedy Delivery for Women in Travel, the like never be- 
fore Published. Price One Guinea. 
Secondly. My Essentia Stomachica Regalis: Or, The 
Royal Stomach Essence, which rectifies all disorders of the 
Stomach, (causing a sweet Breath) as Loathings, Vomit- 
ings, Reachings, and Sickness residing there. From Two 
Shillings to Four Shillings the Bottle. 
Thirdly. My Pulvis Antifebriticus: Being a most cer- 
tain and safe Remedy for all manner of Fevers, of what 
Name, Species, or Kinds soever, and has scarcely been 
ever known to Fail, where there was any the least Hopes 
of Life. It is likewise good to prevent Fevers after a 
Surfeit, or hard Drinking, working only by Sweat and 
Urine: And if Gentlemen that are obliged to Drink Hard, 
would take a Dose now and then, it would certainly pre- 
vent' their ever being troubled with Gout or Rheumatism, 
Price Ten Shillings. 
Fourthly. My Pillulœ Specificœ:  Or, the never 
failing Flux Pills, for all sorts of Looseness or Fluxes, 
White or Red, which are very convenient for all such as 
travel by Sea or Land, in whatever Station soever they 
may be; they will find them of singular Use, and the best 
Remedy ever Published upon that Account. Price Five 
Shillings a Box. 
Fifthly. And also my Spiritus Anticolicus: Or a pre- 
sent and speedy Cure for the Cholick, (of what different 
kind foever) in a quarter of an Hour. From Two Shil- 
lings and Six-pence to Five Shillings the Bottle, 
All which Medicines, with their particular Directions, 
lie Sealed up (with the same Coat of Arms as is upon the 
Title

(14)
Title Page) at the Places where this Book is given 
Gratis, N. B. And likewise at (my Grand Specifick, 
for the Secret Disease only excepted) Mr. Cowells, at the 
White-Hart in Cliffords-Lane, turning up by St. Dun- 
stan's Church, Haberdasher of small Waves; and no where 
else. 
All Merchants, Captains of Ships, or others that Tra- 
vel by Sea or Land, are disposed to take with them any 
Quantity of these Remedies, shall have room for large 
Profit. 
The Grand Impostor Discovered, 
Being REMARKS upon the Practical and Philosophical 
SCHEME of the Secret Disease, &c. 
I Went the other Day to the Lodgings of a particular 
Friend, where, amongst the several Books lying on 
the Table, I cast my Eye upon a Pamphlet, intituled, 
Animadversions on the Practical Scheme of the Secret Di- 
sease: The Title pleased me well, and I promised my self a 
great Satisfaction in the Perusal of it; (having of a long 
time wish’d that some able and elaborate Pen would curb 
the Insolence of that bold daring Priest Tanner, for de- 
filing his Sacred Character, and Vows of Abstinence, by 
raking in the Physicians and Surgeons House of Office: 
Yet, I verily believe, that Learned Priest could never have 
writ so Pointedly on that Distemper, which is the bane of 
all Mankind, had not he been taught it from woful Ex- 
perience:  But, I’ll leave the degraded Priest for a time, and 
return to our Author of the Animadversions. After I 
had thrown away a small Time in running over the Book, 
I found my self so far disappointed in my Expectations, by 
reason he had not taken Notice of any Thing that was 
Material thro' the Whole, the Major-part of it being 
stuffed with vain Repetitions, Tautologies, and Quota- 
tions from the Author of the Practical Scheme: There- 
fore, I design’d to turn the Tide of my Pen from Prose- 
cuting the Animadversions; upon the Authors own 
Practical and Philosophical Scheme of the Secret Disease,
whose

(15)
whose Specificks (as he call it) is Sold at Mr. Pratt's, Cane- 
shop, at the Angel in Cornhill and at Mr. Barnet's. Per- 
fumer, over-against the Hay-Market near Pall-Mall. 
And since he has furnished me with Materials for draw- 
ing his own Protraicture to the Life from his own 
Writings, I shall set every Thing in a true Light, by first 
giving you an Account of the Birth, Education, and fe- 
veral Advances in Learning this Author has made; 
and thence infer what extraordinary Cures are to be ex- 
pected from the Prescriptions of this our great Æsculapi- 
us; and shall next make a few Reflections on the Authors 
Sheme, and thence conclude. 
But here I must beg my Readers Pardon, if I can't gra- 
tifie him with such a clear and satisfactory Account of our 
Doctor's Extract or Birth, as perhaps they may expect: Yet, 
as I am credibly informed from several of his own Coun- 
trymen, (he being a German) that he's descended of such 
obscure Parents, that his Family is not to be distinguished 
from the Plebean Herd. After he had attained to the or- 
dinary acquirements of Reading and Writing, our great 
aspiring Doctors Ambition prompts him on to attempt 
somewhat that might distinguish him from the Vulgar; and 
therefore he pitches upon a Trade (Anglice) a Taylor, expect- 
ing thereby to raise his cross-Legg'd Fortune, by handling, 
the Spanish Pike, to the hazard of so many Ægyptian 
Vermin: But this not answering our Doctors Expecta- 
tions, nor his Income sufficient to satisfie the voracious 
Cravings of his Gormandizing Stomach, (for as I'm told, 
they have Cucumbers and Vacation times there as well as 
here) therefore resolves to put himself to a Baker, thereby 
promising himself certain Bread. But all this while, our 
Doctors proposed Greatness meets with Disappointments, 
he therefore resolves upon a way to distinguish himself 
from the Mob; and there upon commences Surgeon Bar- 
ber; where besides his other great Attainments, he, in a 
short time, learn'd to play upon the Harp; so when he 
had no Business in the Shop, (as often that sell out) it was 
his Custom, to go with his Harp to the Windows of the 
Nunneries to Serenade those vestal Virgins, from whose 
liberal Hands he received more in one Day, then perhaps 
he could get in his Shop in a Week. But this will not 
do neither, to raise our Doctor to his proposed Greatness;
and 

(16)
and what must the Poor Man do? He even resolves to 
leave his Native Country, his Dear Parents, and Kin- 
folks, and undertakes a Peregrination for the Golden Island 
of Britannia; In Order to which, his Equipage is made 
ready, having just as many Shirts as Backs, and every 
Thing else in Proportion, (which, I think, the Doctor 
ought to take as a favourable Providence that he had no 
more, considering his long and tedious Journey): So ha- 
ving bid a final Adieu to all his Acquaintances, he travels 
thro' Germany, Flanders, and Holland, with many Cold 
and Hungry Belly. When he was come to Holland, ano- 
ther insupportable Difficulty, more formidable then all 
the rest arises, there being a great Gulph fixed betwixt 
our Doctor and the promised Land, (by some termed 
a Herring Bond) and how to get over it, he cannot tell: 
Upon which he sets his pragmatical Head at work, to find 
out a way, how he may be wasted over; he thinks, and 
thinks again all to no purpose, till he had almost made 
a dislocation in the Pia Mater of his Brains; and there- 
by run the Hazard of losing the little Senses left him; 
to Swim over, he knew was simply Impossible and to pay 
for his Passage he knew was equally Impossible; yet at 
last hearing of a Pacquet-Boat going for England, he 
went on Board with as good Assurance, as if his Pockets 
had been lined with Yellow-Boys, the Wind Standing 
fair, the Anchor’s weighed, and the Sheets Hall’d home, 
they in a short time arrived in England: There being 
several Persons of Distinction in the Ship, our Doctor steps 
on Shore, under the Covert of being one of their Servants, 
he from thence takes his Progress for London; where he 
had no sooner arrived, but as good fortune wou'd have it; 
he falls into the Company of a Doctor, (a Country 
Man of his own) that made no small Figure amongst the 
Mobility; he out of pity to his distressed Lansman, 
takes him under his Tuition, well knowing that such a 
lusty young Fellow might be a serviceable Slave to him, 
in grinding, beating and shifting his Medicines, and in 
fine in doing all the Drudgery of his Laboratory; with 
whom our Pragmatical Gentleman continued sometime, 
till at length, the old itching humour of Ambition, 
seized him with such a violent Fit, that he resolves now 
or never to try his Fortune In the World, conceiting
himself 

(17)
himself to be a compleat Chymist, tho’ in reality, he 
knows nothing of the Matter, and so upstarts Mushroome 
Doctor in a Moon-light Night, a taste of whose most 
bright Parts, take in the few following Remarks. 
Before I proceed to make any particular Remarks upon 
his Book, I wou’d have you to take notice, that cur 
Nominal Doctor being conscious of his own Ina- 
bility to write, much less compose any thing, that could 
bear the Test of a publick appearing in Print, he has 
therefore all along hired a School Master to com- 
pose and write them. 
In the Title page to the Practical and Philosophical 
Scheme for the Secret Disease, he has committed so many 
Solæcisms, nay, bare faced Fallacy's, that should I pass 
them without a Remark, I might Judge my self guilty 
of a Crime no less than a Piacle. 
Here our Doctor proposes to teach unfortunate Per- 
sons how' they may Cure themselves in a few Days, 
'of Secret Injury's, Owzings, Gleets, Runnings; and 
'in short he runs over a whole Catalogue of the miserable 
'Symptoms, wherewith this Disease is attended; as 
'also the Gout, Rheumatism, Dropsie, and all other Ma- 
'ladies whatsoever; without the least confinement or 
'Suspicion even of their bosom Friends, and that by 
'vertue of his Royal Specifick whose dose is but one 
'Grain. 
Hic vir, Hic est; this, this is the Man, that mut 
Strike the happy Stroke, 
Tanquam Umbra volitant alii, Solus Sapet Iste. 
Others like Vapours wander up and down,
This Man alone deserveth Widom's Crown.
This is the Man that must raise the fallen Tabernacle 
of Learning, he that will repair the Breaches, and Build 
the waste Places of true Philosophy; almost buried in 
its own Rubbish: Which how difficult, Yea how Im-
possible the Atcheivement may seem to be, yet the Super 
Omnipotency of this learned Composer, will upon the 
Head of his Ignorant and absolutely illiterate supposed 
Author, make the Crown to flourish.
B The 

(18)
The truth is, there is Wind and Vapour enough in this 
Scheme, to fill all the Sails of the Doctor's Ambition, 
and vain glorious Mind; Yea over and above to bring 
the Misery upon him Descibed in this Monosti- 
chon. 
Sœpe perit ventis, obruta Cymha suis. 
The Dancing Cock-boat, oft away is cast. 
When fairest Winds do blow too high a Blast. 
And I’m ap’t to believe, he could never make choise 
of a more proper means for his own undoing; than by 
Suffering his parasitical Composer, to write such great 
things of him. 
Credibile est ipsum, sic Voluisse Mori, 
Most like it is that this way he did choose 
be undone; and others all refuse. 
But Methinks the Doctor might have foreseen, that 
the Catalougue of Distempers he Enumerates in the Title 
Page, are, or least many of them, of a quite different 
Nature to the Secret Disease; and can never be Occasion’d 
by former ill Cures as he alledges: I allow they may be 
posterior, but never consquential to that Distemper; 
as proceeding from other cause of, a far different Nature 
from this Disease. And therefore good Mr. Doctor I'll 
make bold to ask you One Question, how comes this 
your Royal Specifick, to be indued with so many excel- 
lent Quality’s distinct from, nay contrary to your own 
definition of a Specifick? in the 6th Chapter of the 
Practical and Philosaophical Scheme, ' You say with 
'Doctor Sydenham that a Specifick Remedy, is that which 
'acts Electively against some one Distemper, rather than 
'another. The very word Specifick, denotes and implies 
'a disposition most of all pertinent, and apt to act on 
'some one particular Disease, &c. But your Specifick is 
to cure the Dropsy, Gout, Rheumatism, &c. and if this 
be not a contradiction in Terminis; I never heard one 
in my Life. Besides Sir, not to make a Practice of it. 
I'll

(19)
I’ll make hold to tell you roundly in your Ear, if you 
had a Specifick? that could, Cure really and effectually, 
the above mentioned Distampers, viz. Gout, and Rheu- 
matism; (instead of thus making your self a ridiculous 
Laughing-stock to the World, by selling your Tail-Timbet 
Animadversions, on Tanners Book at 3d. a piece, to 
desray the exhorbitant Demands of your Scrivener.)
You might keep your Coach and Six, but as you can- 
not doe the one, we may very reasonably conclude you 
know nothing of the Other. 
In the 4th Page, our Doctor says; 'Tis likewise true 
that this Distemper may be propagated by, Lying, Drink- 
ing, and Speaking, only 'with one that is Corrupted 
'with it; or wearing the same Cloath's, lying in the 
'same Sheets, or sitting on the same Saddle or Close-stool, 
'after any Infected Person,’ I shall very readily grant 
that this Disease may be got by lying in the same Bed 
for any considerable time, with a Person, (tho’ of the 
same Sex) that has the Venereal Disease in a high De- 
gree: So likewise will any Garment worn by a Person 
severely Poxt, give it to a found Person; because in both 
these Cases, the Infectious Effluvia’s enter most parts of 
the Body, and fixin in the Miliary Glands, Occasions 
unusual Itchings, Tinglings, and little breakings out 
in the Skin, &c. But that it should be propagated by 
Drinking, or Sitting on the same Saddle or Close-stool after 
any Infected Person, is both contradictory to reason and 
daily Experience; for were it so Infectious as the Doctor  
alledges, then we should be in as bad, if not a worse 
Condition than our Fore-Fathers, when the Plague was 
in London, of which so many Thousands Died. For it 
must be allowed, that in a great many Taverns and 
Coffee-Houses, in and about London, that are much 
frequented by Men of Trade and Business; amongst all 
these we may very reasonably believe there is one or 
more Infected Person; that Person going to the Necessa- 
ry-House or Closestool, and after him it’s ten to one 
but several clean Persons goes to the same Place; then 
according to his Hypothesis, they must be all Infected, 
they being in the same case, must of necessity commu- 
nicate it to others, and so ad Infinitum.
B2 our 

(20)
Our Doctor has taken up most part of his 5th Page 
in lashing the degraded Priest Tanner, and perhaps not, 
unjustly, for absurdly asserting that a vast number of 
poysonous Minute Animalculæ, by the help of a Mi- 
croscope, are to be discovered in Aqua Fortis; which 
is no less contradictory to Natrue, than it is also ridi- 
culous and absur’d: But as I do not vindicate the Priest. 
So I would also recommend our Doctor to a Text drawn 
from the Sacred Oracles, (to which I am afraid he is as 
great a Stranger as to Chymistry and Philosophy) and 
pronounced by one who never knew Sin, viz. Thou 
Fool, pluck out the Beam that's in thine own Eye, then 
shalt thou see clearly to take out the Mote that's in thy 
Brother's Eye. I leave him to make the Inferences. 
A little lower, says the Doctor,  This being thus pre- 
'mised, it appears, that whoever is not perfectly as well 
'skil’d in Chymistry, as in the Principles of Philosophy 
'and Anatomy, can't pretend to understand the Nature 
'of this Disease: Nor, how or when to oppose Alca 
lies to Acids, & Vice versa, &c.' The Inference is very 
good; yet, I hope, according to the Scheme of his pro- 
found Learning laid down in the foregoing Pages, he has 
not any Pretence to that Noble Science of Philosophy, I 
must, in Addition to his other brighter Parts, allow him 
some small Knowledge in the Practice of Chymistry and 
Anatomy; otherwise, I should derogate from his other Ac- 
quirements: For no question, when he took his Degrees 
as Master of Arts, at the famous University of Colle- 
giate Taylors, he then learn'd so much Chimistry, as to 
extract his own Cloathing out of other Men’s, and then 
upon Occasion, transmute that into Silver or Gold, and 
so vice versa. And if he is not the very greatest Clod- 
pate and Numbscull in Nature, he must be an absolute 
Professor of Anatomy, having Disected so many of the 
Ægyptian Vermin, whilst amongst his cross-Leg’d Frater- 
nity upon the Shop-board. So much for our Chymist and 
Anatomist. 
At the bottom of the 5th Page, says he, 'I designed 
'to treat here of the Chimical Principles with the fore- 
'going, to explicate the 3d Stage; but being more ade- 
'quate and suitable to be inferted amongst the Exper- 
'ments in the Chapter of Curiosities, I shall desist from
'it

(21)
'it this time.’ After perusing his 7th Chapter of select 
Experiments and Curiosities, I find the Doctor or beings sen- 
sible of his own Inability for so hard a Task, he has not 
writ one Word of the Chymical Principles, but refers his 
Reader to another Book that lies Sealed up with other Cu- 
riosities at the Shops where his Royal Specificks are to be 
Sold: Yet since he has disappointed me in making any 
Remarks upon it here, I would advise him, if his Book 
of Curiosities and Chymcial Principles is not already 
published (as I am apt to believe it is not) to let it lye dor- 
mant amongst the rest of his Impertinent scriblings; or 
else commit it to the Custody of the rude Flames, 
and as they are a burning, let him consider how nearly 
they represent his other writings, in having the same fate, 
and dying by the same Hands, as will one Day his Practical 
Scheme and Animadversions, 
I purposely omit a great many things that might be ta- 
ken notice of, in the several Pages of his Scheme, they 
being more proper to be Incerted in the Remarks upon 
his Sheet of Private Directions Sealed up with his Royal 
Specifick. 
I am now come to the 16th Page, where he tells us of a- 
'bundance of Experiments Essayed by Dr. Boyle, Pontesque 
'and himself, with many others upon Animal Creatures, 
'such as Fowles, Dogs, Cats, Hedge-Hodgs and Swine, 
'&c. to reconcile them to the Disease; but all to no
'purpose. What did these Experiments prove (says he) 
'as much as to say One, is One, A Clap is a Clap, &c. 
'and is but petitio, probationis a priori, and don't re- 
'solve what we are in Quest of, vix. the principle 
'cause and reason why things are as they be; so that they 
'who content themselves with that knowledge' only, 
'will give me leave, I hope to tell them, without de- 
'triment to their other brighter Parts, they are not a Pin 
'the Wiser, as to the knowledge of the Disease, or its 
'Cure, then they were before, to afford them a reason 
'of the Principle (and hitherto Secret) Cause, of this 
'Disease, and trace it from the beginning to the end, 
'must be by quite different Experiments, and such as 
'Gentlemen never yet heard of. 
O! Glorious Nation, but much more happy People, to 
whom Indulgent Heaven, has been so propitious as in
B5 our

(22)
our Days to raise up a second Solomon, nay a greater 
than Solomon is here; for to him is committed the Key 
to unlock all the Arcana’s, and Occult being in Nature, 
and to make Phœnomena's appear. But now let’s see how 
far our Spermologust has unriddled this great Mistery, 
of the hitherto Secret Cause of this Disease; and upon 
further Inquiry we shall find him, tiring his Readers 
Patience with tedious Galimaufries, and Rapsodies, of 
ill digested and incohærent Suppositions, of meer Impro- 
babilities, nay plain Impossibilities; Which after peru- 
sal, the Reader will of necessity be obliged to conclude our
Doctors, to fall under Censor of the Poet in this 
Verse. 
Parturiunt Montes, Nascetur ridiculus Mus. 
The Hills in Labour were, and troubled all about, 
At length to give them Ease a little Mouse creeps out. 
But whether do I run? I had almost forgot what he 
tell us in the Words above Quoted; that this is to be 
made appear, by quite Different Experiment, and such, as 
Gentlemen had never yet seen or heard of; and truly I’m 
of the Doctors Opinion, Nay, I am very well satisfied, 
he never either saw, or Experimented them in his Life, 
and therefore we must pin our belief to Chimera's, 
Non-Entities and Suppositions in his powerful demon- 
strations. 'Admit (says he) a Gentleman puts one Grain 
'of Sal Microcosmi to another, the'll Encounter and 
'assault each other, with such abundance of Ardour and 
'Violence, as transcends belief; Then as it were by a 
'mutual consent and Agreement lay aside, and change 
'their martial Temper into warm imbraces, and incor- 
'porate with so much Vehemence as immediately to be 
'converted into a Flame, capable to set the whole Uni- 
'verse in an Uproar or Desolationi by Fire. Here the 
Strength of our Doctors Experiments lies in the Suppo- 
sition of a Salt, almost impossible to be made; then he 
backs the Experiment with such dismal and direful Ef- 
fects, as are sufficient to deter any Person from making 
Tryal; and from thence he infers the fallacy of his Sup- 
position shall never be discovered. But under Correction
good 

(23)
good Mr. Doctor, shall I ask you where must a Gentle- 
man come by this Sal Microcosmi, which can be made of 
no other but a considerable quantity of Sperma, or Se- 
men humanum, (for all other Salts made of any part of 
Man, are upon Tryal found to be false, not producing 
your proposed Effects) and to make a Salt of that mat- 
ter merely for the Tryal of your supposed Experiment, 
(it being of no other Phyiscal Use) were a Sin, Equally 
heinous against Nature, as it is against the Positive Laws 
of God. 
In the 17th Page, be produces another Experiment, 
establish upon as weak Principles, and producing as im- 
possible Effects, which he thinks are sufficent (as he says) 
to make one clearly understand the whole Nature of the 
Disease, &c. and now being Don Quixot like, taken 
with a delirium, and fancying himself to have united the 
Gordian Knot of Obscurity, he in pure Commiseration 
to his Fellow-Creatures, being in an Extasie, bursts out 
in the following Exclamation, 'What a prodigious Ca- 
'lamity and pity is it that Physicians, for the Generality 
'are no Chymists, and on the contrary Chymists (in the 
'Vulgar acceptation) no Physicians, &c. Very well 
Mr. Doctor, rem acu tetigisti, you’ve hit the Nail on the 
Head, but then I hope you have no just Pretensions to 
either, as I have already made appear. Let’s hear then what 
he says a little lower, 'it’s not Sufficient (says he) to 
'use a Specifick, promiscuously for all forts of Consti- 
'tutions and not to know its Quality’s and when to vary 
'it; for being possessor of 22 Authors Specificks; for 
'this very Disease from my Predecessors, and other 
'Communications, with old and choice Manuscripts, &c. 
And what of all this Sir, if you have the Works of 
Sir Kenelm Digby, Sir Robert Talbot, Doctor Boyle, 
Pontesque and others who were all your Predecessors, 
you might have said, you was Possessor of 100 Specificks; 
without Eclipsing the Works of these Celebrated Au- 
thors, (whose Memory will be Savory to after Ages) by 
bringing in Competition with them your old Musty and rot- 
ten Manuscripts: But allow,you are Possessor of the Works 
of these Learned Men, that does not say that you can 
ever perform any Radical Cure, only Acting by rote. 
B4 and

(24)
and like a Parrot in a Cage, your Tongue may Prattle, 
what your Head does not understand. 
And to draw the Reader into a firm beliefe of your 
great Ability’s and profound Learning, you go on in the 
same Page, saying, and having gone thro’ three Chy- 
'mical Courses in Universities, yet found my self at a 
'great Loss in respect to the Management thereof, altho’ 
'at the same time frequently used them in Acamedies 
'promiscuously with great and a stonishing Success. 
I begin now Shrowdley to suspect, that the Doctor is 
nearly related to a certain Quack Doctor that keept a 
Mountebanck Stage in Smithfield, who amongst the ma- 
ny lofty Titles and Epithets he assumes to himself, in his 
Harangu’s made to the Gaping Mob; that he may with 
the more facility Cajole them out of their Money; de- 
signs himself sworn Servant to his most Sacred Majesty 
King GEORGE, which the poor Credulous Herd taking 
for Truth, and believing him to be a sworne Surgeon to 
his Majesty, does thereupon part with their Money, and 
oft times their Health and Lives in to the Bargain; and 
who should this Man be all the while, but a Soldier 
in the first Regiment of Guards, and is indeed a sworn 
Servant to his Majesty, having taken the Oath as all o- 
ther Soldiers doe. Just so our Doctor here (If Persons 
of any distinguishing judgment, would suffer themselves 
to be Imposed upon) Endeavours to persuade them in 
the belief of his great Progress in Learning and Practical 
Philosophy, when he himself knows as I have already 
made appear that he never was Student in any one Uni- 
versity, much less Universities, therefore by his Univer- 
sities nothing else can be understood than the Taylor, 
Bakers, and Barbers-Shops mentioned in the foregoing 
Pages, and therefore no Wonder the Doctor found him- 
self at a great Loss, in following the Prescripts of these 
learned and sam’d Physicians; since he was equally as 
great a Stranger to the Nature and Cause of the Disease; 
as he was to the Medicines prescribed, and therefore if 
they were attended with Success as he says, it must be 
attributed to meer Chance, and none of his Direction. 
Now to put the Super-excellency of his Learning, and 
the Credit of his Performances beyond all ground of di- 
spute; he proceeds in the same Page, 'and since
'says 

(25)
'("says he) my particular Application and Study has been 
'chiefly upon Examining the Nature of different Salts 
'(from whence all beings in Nature, draw their Origine, 
'duration and Destruction) it has been so wonderfully 
'blest by the almost Miraculous Cures, I've wrought; 
'that I don't repent of the time and Money spent these 
'many Years past, whereby I have Discovered and per- 
'fectly understand the different Nature both of the 
'Disease and Specificks, 
Here he has vented several very gross Absurdities, which 
makes me think he has very ill bestowed his time in 
Studying and Examining the Nature of Salts, from 
whence he most Ignorantly avers, all beings in Nature 
draw their Origine, duration and Destruction; 
had he said that all Things in Nature draw their 
Origine and Duration from one Universal Salt, 
or first matter (to the knowledge of which it seems 
he is an absolute Stranger) then his Hypothesis had 
been conform to the Opinion of both Ancient and Mo- 
dern Philosophers: But to say that all beings in Nature, 
draw their Destruction from Salts, is a Position not only 
contrary to the Universal Laws of Nature, but also Con- 
tradictory to common Experience and Observation. There 
is no true Physick but what is in Salt, for Salt was never 
known to Putrifie, nay it hinders Putrifaction and Cor- 
ruption, in all Things, and what hinders Corruption, 
preserves also from Destruction. Now it's evident to all 
the World, that Salts hinders Corruption and a Solution 
of the Parts, and this not only in living things, but 
even in dead Bodies; for if they are seasoned with Salt, 
then are they preserved from Corruption, and conse- 
quently from Destruction. But to treat of Salts in this 
place; would be quite Extraneous from my present Sub- 
ject; Therefore I shall Advise the Doctor to bestow a lit- 
tle more time and Application in Studying the Nature 
of Salts, so shall he have less reason to repent of the time 
and Money spent these many Years past (if his own bare 
Assertion is to be believed) and not thus, Hand over- 
Head to vent such incongruities as have (I'm afraid) al- 
ready made him a Laughing Stock to the whole Common- 
Wealth of Learning. 
I'm

(26)
I'm come to make a few Observation, on the Doctor's 
Sealed up Directions for the use of his Specifick; in 
Prosecution of which I shall pull off the Vizard from 
the Face of this Empty Pretender, to Philosophy, Chy- 
mistry, and Anatomy, by unridiling the Mystery wrapt 
up in this his wonderful Grain; In the next Place, I'll 
give you an exact Transcript of his general Rules; and 
under each rule (if there is any thing material to be ob- 
served) I'll show you how disingenious our Doctor is 
with his Patient in prescribing Rules that are dissonant 
with, my even Contradictory to Several Positions 
laid down in his Practical and Philosophical Scheme, 
&c. and then conclude In the 18th Page says the Doctor,
'The Dose of the Specifick, being but of the bigness of 
'a large Pins-Head, and a Grain; working and opera- 
'ting by all Secretory and Execretory ways. If this now 
'is no Specifick there is no such thing as a Specifick in the 
'Universe, which only rest in my Breast, who am the 
'sole Author and Inventer of it; This is matter of Fact, 
'(the most cenvincing Argument that can be,) &c. 
Fie upon the Doctor to commit so many Fallacies in 
so few Lines; could he think of nothing else than a 
Grain of Salt of Tarter, Vitriolated, which every Petty 
Apothecary knows as well as himself. Methinks he 
might have taken a small quantity of Brickdust, pounded 
into an Impalpable Powder, or some such thing, which 
had been much more puzling to the learned than vitrio- 
lated Tarter (bought at every Chymist for 3d. an 
Ounce) to which he has attributed so many excellent 
Qualities, as working by all Secretory and Excretory 
Ways. Here I must be bold to tell the Doctor that this is 
a Manifest Untruth, for I or any Man else may take 20 
or 30 Grains of this Salt, (it being like a Chip in Pot- 
tage) without making any visible Operation in the Body, 
Secretory or Excretory; unless by Making use of his 
adjunct of Salt of Vipers, which by his favour I must 
tell him 10 or 12 Grains is sufficient of it self to Sweat 
any Man that is not of a more than Ordinary strong 
Constitution, without his insignificant Grain of Tarta- 
rum Vitrilatum; and yet the Doctor will have this 
to be a Specifick, for the Secret Disease, Otherwise there 
is no such thing as a Specifick in the Universe, which 
only




[28]
'2. 'Whenever you take it you may go Abroad or a- 
'bout your Business, but take considerable care against 
'great Motion, Excercise, Strong, Stale, Sowre, Sharp, 
'or Distilled Liquors, Salt or Spiced Meats, all Sorts of 
'Fruits and Cheese, here follow Rules, or expect 
'no Cure, live Regular and especially Chast, for to In- 
'flame the Blood and stir up the Humours therein, does 
'but more Subtilify the Venereal Venom, and consequent- 
'ly take deeper Root in any part of your Blood and 
'Body, and Increases the Malignity which you see on 
'many that might have been Cured a great while ago; 
'whereas perhaps their Condition at first might not be 
'half so bad as yours; but we won’t mind them do but 
'overcome your self a little and be glad to meet with a 
'perfect: Cure. 
Remark. Methinks the Doctor might have left this 
out, for you are not to expect; your Cure from his Speci- 
sick, if we are to lay any stress on what he says in his par- 
ticular Directions for every Stage, where after having 
ordered you how to use his Specifick Medicines in the 
3d Stage, he says, 'if you have any Holes, Ulcers, Rot- 
'ten-Bones, Cancers, Excressency, &c. or if your case 
'is otherwise than what is Mentioned in the forego- 
'ing Rules, &c. Consumption, heat in your Eyes, 
'or whole Mass of Blood, Salty-Tast, Vertigo, and 
'Head-ach, &c. write a Letter to the Author, and 
'he’ll assist you with Medicines proper for your Malady. 
Now has not our Author in the Title Page of his 
Scheme, and several Places else told us, that all these 
Symptoms above recited are Concomitants of and Atten- 
dants to the 3d Stage; Then our Doctor does as much 
as say if your Case be really the 3d Stage, do not expect 
your Cure from my Specifick; but write a Letter to the 
Author, &c. Now to any Person of the least Discern- 
ing Judgment, can this be any thing else but a Decoy, 
by which he designes to Cajole his Patient, perhaps out 
of another Guinea to as little purpose as that thrown a 
way upon his Specifick. 
3d. 'One of the little Papers being but a Grain and 
'mixt with 15 Grains of the Salt of Vipers, is to be 
'taken but twice a Week only, in the Morning about 
'7 or 8 a Clock and Sweat quietly at least 4 Hours,
and

[29]
'and then you must miss taking the above said Specifick 
'&c. during your illness, especially when you Sweat 
'keep your self pretty warm in the Day, with Cloaths, 
'and your Head particularly at Night, least the Venom 
'settle therein and cause Violent Head-achs and other 
'Mischeifs. 
 4th, 'Throughout all the Cure, whatever Stage it be- 
'longs to eat and drink plentifully of boyl'd-Turnips, 
'boyl'd-Milk, Broth, Sage-Tea, Whey, Milk-Pottage, 
'French-Pearl, or Barley-Gruel, either of them mixt 
'with small chopt Parsely, and with or without Milk, 
'and if no Occasion don’t be Blooded. 
Remark. How they are to drink boyled-Turnips. I can’t un- 
derstand, unless he means the Syrrup or Juice of Turnips, 
and then he should have given them Directions how to 
have made it, otherwise the Patient is at a loss; and I think 
he is much more out of the way, to prescribe Milk in 
the Venereal Disease, for altho’ it be of an Alcalizate 
Nature, yet it is soon Corrupted and Putrified, by a 
Vitiated Ferment into an Acid, the Coagulum of which 
must of Consequence be of a hard Digestion,he con- 
cludes this Rule; if no Occasion don’t be Blooded, 
here I think the Doctor should have given his Patient 
a perticular Charge by all Means to be aware of Bleed- 
ing; but the poor Patient is left to stand upon his own 
Legs, and depend upon his own Judgment, the Doctor 
being sensible of his own insufficiency, for as it can 
easily be made appear Blooding is very prejudicial in 
most Distempers, especially in this; If it be a Liminary 
or outside Infection; by Blooding [which the Patient 
being left to his own Discretion may Ignorantly do] 
the Disease, Secundum Artem is propagated in a short 
time, from an outside Infection to a Virulent Clap and 
so to a Pox, if not prevented by a right Application. 
5th. 'During your heat of Urine, get by a Chimist, 
'made up for 3d. the following Diuretick Powder. 
'Take calcined Mussel-Shells, Salt of Prunella, Vitric- 
'lated Tarter, of each, a Dram all in Powder, mix 
'it and make fix Doses thereof, take one every three 
'Hours; or if you like Drops better, get hy a Chymist 
'half an Ounce of Tincture of Tartar mix t with half 
'am Ounce of Tincture of Antimony, [both for Six- 
'pence)

[30]
'pence] Take 8o Drops every 3 Hours in any Li- 
'quor. 
6th. 'IF you have got a Running you must Syringe 
'your self often in a Day to keep the Urinary Passage 
'open and clean. You may buy a Syringe at any Pew- 
'terers-Shop for 8d. try first in Water in the Shop, 
'whether it makes a good Stream or not. 
7th. 'To make the Lotion is in the manner following; 
'mix the whole Pot full with a full Point of Plantains 
'or fair Water in a Bottle, and put to it 2 Spoonfuls of 
'French-Brandy ora Spoonful of Champhire Spirit, keep 
'it close and use it alter the manner following, first shake 
'always the Bottle, than pour out near two Spoonfulls 
'and warm it over the Candle, &c. then put first the 
'Syringe into the Liquor that no Air get in [which 
'would hurt you] draw the Squirt to and fro' to make 
'first a good Stream and mix the Lotion; than draw 
'the Squirt about half out, take it out of the Liquor and 
'and draw the Squirt a little more out to suck a little 
'more Air in [to prevent spilling aside applying it to 
'your Private Parts, and keep the Point ot the Syringe 
'close in the Orifice of the Urinary Passage with your 
'left Hand and with the next Finger to the Thumb of 
'your right Hand Squirt it in and draw the Pipe out. 
'and keep the Liquor in as long as you can. 
'Take notice before you inject the Lotion, you must 
'always first inject warm Milk, therefore get always 
'first, half a point of warm-Milk, put half a Spoonful 
'of Camphire Spirit or French-Branday to it, and Syringe 
'you with it before the Lotion, than with the rest if 
'you are a Woman, wash your parts, or better if you 
'are a Man hang your Yard or whole private Parts if 
'it is swell’d Sore or broke out, with Weales, Red-Spots 
'&c. for some Minutes in that Milk is warm as you 
'can bare it, and then put Ointments or Plaisteis to 
'it. 
8th, 'For to keep Plaisters on your Private Parts get 
'a Leather Thimble like the finger of a Glove, with a 
'hole before, to make water through, and keep it on 
'overall, tye it by two Strings about your Waste, so if you 
'havearunning tye a Naptkin or Handkerchief about you, 
which

[31]
which will hide you from being discovered by your soul 
Linnen. 
'A Woman had best to keep her Plaister on her Parts. 
'Tye a four times double String made of your old Smock. 
'&c. about you, and on every side backward, fasten two 
'such other Strings, and put it from behind through your 
'Leggs to fasten it by your Navel, on that String about 
'you between your Fundament and Private Parts sew’d to- 
'gether, that none of them can flip aside, and so keep
'Plaisters, or any thin on.
9th If you have any Soreness, Nods, or rising Buboes 
'spread a little Diachlon [made with Gums] on a bit of 
'Linnen Cloth and bind it on. You may buy a Penny- 
'worth at the Apothecaries, but if a Buboe arises to a 
'great height, and is very corrupted, you have best let it, 
'break; and after it is broke put a Tent with Basilicon 
'Ointment into the Hole with a Paracelsus plaister over 
'it, and besure draw it after that Manner, till it be heal-
'ed up. 
Remarks. Here he is very Solicitous to his Patient 
for his Management of a Bubo, if it arises to to a great 
Heigth; which shows that he’s now become diffident of 
the Power and Efficacy of his Specifick, as being unable 
to Encounter such a Powerful Enemy; for had it been 
Endued with such Extraordinary Quality’s he has attribut- 
ed to it in the 7th Chapter of his Scheme, [the Contrary 
of which I have already made appear,] then every body 
wou’d much more reasonably conclude, he might have 
prescribed a Dose or two of his Specifick, which wou’d 
have carried off the Morbifick Matter; sooner then Tents- 
Plaisters, &c. which are the common Butchery’s us’d by 
every Surgeon to Cruciate there Patients, thereby to 
Extort another Fee from them ; whereas ’tis a known 
Maxim in Physick, if the cause is Remov’d, the Effects 
will ease, but as I have hinted before; he knew very 
well his Specifick would not do it, therefore he advises to a 
Method much more tedious and Cruciating. 
'10th. If one or both of your Testicles be inflamed, 
'Swelled, and Sore, take of dry Sage of Uertue, Camc-
'mile, Mellelot and Lavender Flowers, of each half a 
'Handful, and heat them in Claret or Milk and lay it
'on, renew it when it is cold till the Swelling is gone,
'but

[32]
'but if this be too troublesome; and can’t be observ'd 
'by reason of your Affairs, then buy half a Pint of Bead 
'Flower at the Corn Chandlers, Camphire in fine Pow- 
'der [to do with a few drops of Spirit of Wine, must be 
'put into the Mortar along with it, else it is impossible 
'to powder it,] two Drams, enough Vinegar or Claret 
'to make it into a Poultise, apply it as warm as you 
'can bear it in a Sheeps-Bladder, and tye it to a string 
'about your Waste, renew this once or twice a Day. 
'and it will soon be well again. 
'Where there is any Pimples or Rawness, you had best 
'put first little Plaisters upon them and then the Mixture 
'over all the Plaisters, Swellings, or Inflamation, don’t 
'forget to wash the parts or any Sore with warm Cam- 
'phire-Milk, as the end or the 1th Rule bids you; 
11th 'For all Venereal Weals, Pimples, Pustules, 
'Shankers, frettings, and Rawnnesses, or other such 
'breakings out the following Mixture, is the most Cer- 
'tain thing it's this, take Honey of Roses half an Ounce,
'Mercurius Dulcis, Balsum of Capaivi, of each a 
'quarter of an Ounce, Balsum of Peru, Oyle-Olive of 
'each one Dram, mix all these well together whenever 
'you use it. 
'Take notice if a Shanker get proud Flesh in it or 
'have any Excressency’s you had best after you have 
'wash’d it with Camphire-Milk, put a little burnt- 
'Allom, made into an Impalpable Powder into it and 
'if it Smart a little dont’ be afraid it’s presently over, 
'then lay the Other upon it. 
12th, 'If you get Caruncles in the Vrinary Passage 
'or any Carious Bones; or an Excressency, Cancers, &c. 
'in the Womb, Fundament, &c. [which not one in a 
'100 hath] leave in the Shop a Letter for the Author, 
'and he’ll direct you to a particular Surgeon whom he 
'Instructs for that purpose. 
Remark. Instead of a perticular Surgeon, whom he 
Instructs for that purpose, if he had said, he would direct 
you to a particular Surgeon, whose extraordinary per- 
formances in of Chyrurgical Operations has rendred him fa- 
mous for that purpose than his Directions had been good; 
but to Depend upon one whom he Instructs, who knows 
nothing

[33]
nothing of it himself, I'am afraid the Patient will meet 
but with a very indifferent Cure. 
13th. 'If your Head or Body is broke out, wash
'it first with Camphire-Milk, and afterwards with the 
'Lotion let it dry, then anoint it with that mentioned 
'in Rule the 11th. Take notice before you do any 
'thing to your Head and Body, you must at least have 
'taken once or twice of the Grains in the little Papers, 
'Mixt as aforesaid. 
14th. 'If your Case belongs to the 2d. or 3d. Stage, 
'viz. if you are broke out, find your Stomach foul 
'or feel a load on it; gnawing Pains, &c. begin your 
'Cure with one of the Papers for the 3d Stage, Sealed 
'up with the Lotion, and take in the Morning in a 
'Spoonful of Ale, &c. after every Vomit, fail not to 
'drink a draught of warm-Broth, Watergruell, &c. 
'when it has done Working, drink half a Pint of Mace- 
'Ale, or two Dishes of Coffee, &c. the Day after the 
'next use the like again, then begin with the Specificks 
'in the Gallipots and the Grains in the little Papers mixt 
'with 15 Grains of Salt of Vipers as aforementioned. 
Remark. In this Rule he prescribes several Vo- 
mits wherein he discovers [in this as in all his Other 
Prescriptions] a great deal of Weakness, it being ob- 
vious to the meanest Capacity that the Violence of a 
Vomit exhales the Venemous Effluvia's of the Disease
up into the Head, which when settled there does often 
prove of dangerous Consequence; and therefore it’s the 
Universal Opinion of all Judicious and expert Physitians, 
that Vomiting in any degree of this Disease is to be 
avoided, it being much more safe to carry it off by Sudori- 
ficks, Diureticks, and Catharticks, than any other way. 
15th. 'If you get a Sore in your Mouth or Throat, 
'take Honey of Roses, Syrrup of Mulberries of each 
'one Ounce, Roch-Allom in Powder half a Dram, dissolve 
'it in half a Pint of Plantain-Water wash your 
'Mouth and Throat with it as often as you please. 
'To stop a Running, take half an Ounce of Gum 
'Dragon, put it in a Pint of Rose-Water, and Sweeten 
'it with an Ounce or two of Syrrup of Roses, and 
'when, dissolved take Morning, Noon and Night a 
'Spoonful of the same.
C 'I'll

[34] 
'I’ll Supply you here with a Diet Drink for your 
'common Drink, if your Case be the 2d or 3d Stage. 
'Take the Bark of Sassifras, a quarter of a Pound, 
'Sassaparilla, China-Root, Liquorish,  Burdock-Root 
'each 2 Ounces, Powder of Antimony half a Pound, Sena, 
'Rhubarb, Crystal of Tartar, Aniseeds, Elecampane, 
'of each an Ounce, boyle these together (every one of 
'them Sliced and Cut) well covered in a Gallon of Wa- 
'ter; a Minute before you take it off, put to it a Bunch 
'of Red-Sage, and an Ounce of Snake Root, let it stand 
'in a cold place without Straining, and drink it by 
'it self or with Milk, continue till you get well again. 
Remark. Now lets see how this agrees with what 
he has most reflectingly advanced against the abdicated 
Priest Tanner) in the 14th Rage of his own Practical 
and Philosophical Scheme, &c. whereafter having made 
large Encomiums and tedious Harangues, upon the 
Vertue of his own Royal Specifick, he like a Mad-Man 
just broke out of Bedlam, falls a beating and throwing 
his Blows about, and says; Methinks here comes the no- 
ted Doctor with his Gallons of Diet-Drinks and Ever- 
lasting Slops, &c. (meaning Tanner) here he brands the 
Prescription of Diet Drinks, with the Infamous Cha- 
racter of Destructive and consuming qualities; and yet 
the poor Man, being a little come to himself again, is 
forced, in consideration of the insufficiency of his own 
Specifick to prescribe his Patient a Diet Drink; which 
to use his own Expressions can be no less Tedious, than 
they are Nausious and Noxious; besides the Doctor 
has forgot, how in his Title Rage, and several other 
places of his Book, that he says any illiterate Person, 
tho' in the Remotest Parts of the World may turn their
own Physitians, as well as if they had many Physitians
present. Now by your leave Mr. Doctor, how must a 
Man come at all these Ingredients in your Diet-Drink, 
besides an Infinite number more Scattered in your other 
Directions, when he is either in the East or West-Indies 
&c. in the use of which (if they will cure at all) de- 
pends the Major part of your Cure, and therefore with- 
out these, which are not to be come at in a great many 
Parts of the World, the poor Man, (altho he may have 
yours or Tanner's Specificks and make use of never so
many 

(35)
many of them) is as far to seek in his cure as before. Tan- 
ner's Specifick (which is Sold at Mrs Garraways, under the 
Royal-Exchange, and at the Celebrated Necklace without Temple- 
Bar, &c.) being attended with as many Nauseous Medicines 
to be taken along with it as your Own, 
DIRECTIONS in particular for every Stage. 
First Stage. ‘Take the Royal Specifick in the little Pot for 
‘a few Days, together, or till you find 
‘the Matter that flows from you become of a Whiter and 
‘Thinner consitence, and then you need not take it so often, 
‘don’t forget Syringing yourself, and after all, if the Run- 
‘ning is not quite gone, stop it with Rule 16. For heat of 
‘Urine look Rule 5, which will assist and second the Opera- 
‘tion of the Specifick chiefly by Urine, after you get well, by no 
‘means, leave off taking the Specifick, (for fear of leaving 
‘any Malignity behind,) it being the only Specifick in the 
‘World to root out the Infection. 
2d Stage. ‘You proceed as just now ordered for the 1st 
‘Stage, but if you have any Inflamation, Swellings, break- 
‘ings out, &c. I would have you mark and mind your own 
‘Rules, before the rest. Here you must not forget to take 
‘twice a Week, the Grain with 15 Grains of the Salt of 
‘Vipers; let the Salt of Vipers be put in a Viol, when you 
‘go to buy it, but you mult put same Ale or Water, to rinse 
‘them out of the Bottle into a Spoon or Coffee-Dish, and then 
‘mix the Grains along with it. 
3d Stage. ‘First of all begin with the 2 Papers of Powder 
‘Sealed up with the Lotion of the 3d Stage, as Rule  14 
‘directs you; when you have done with ’em, take both of 
‘the Specificks, viz. that in the little Pot 2 or 3 times a 
‘Week, and the Grain with Salt of Vipers twice, and don’t 
‘forget to Sweat always in the Morning with it; and 
‘drink constantly the Diet-Drink. If you have any Holes, 
‘Ulcers, Rotten-Bones, Cancers, Excressencie, &c. or your case 
‘is otherwise than what is mentioned in the foregoing 
‘Rules, viz Consumption, heat in your Eyes, or whole Mass of 
‘Blood, salty tast, Vertigo, Head-Ach, &c. Write a Letter to 
‘the Author, and he’ll assist you with Medicines proper sot
‘for your Malady. 
‘If any Gentleman is curious about the Experiments,they 
‘lye Sealed up in the Shops with Directions how to use them, 
‘with their several Prices, according to their Excellency. 
‘Those Persons that don’t care to be at the trouble to 
‘manage themselves, may know where the Surgeon lives, 
‘who hath proper Instructions for the Management of the 
‘same beyond any other.
C2 ‘Go 

(36)
‘Go on Couragiously, don't grow Impatient or give 
‘over, if the Cure is not presently finished; things will ac- 
‘cording to the degree of Malignity receiv’d an Answer in 
‘time. Therefore don’t grow weary of using it, but be 
‘glad to meet with that perfect Cure, whereby Kings and 
‘Princes have been Cured; and after you find your self 
‘well again be sure to continue for some time longer, to 
‘leave no Venom behind, or to prevent a Relapse. 
Remark Don’t the Doctor In this place by endeavouring 
to Establish the Reputation of this Medicine; tacitely 
throw a most unbecoming Reflection upon the best of 
Kings and Princes, for were it true as he Alledges, 
we might very reasonably believe his performing Cures 
upon such Principalities should have Recommended him to be 
admitted as one of the Physitians, at least in Ordinary to the 
Potentate on whom these Cures were wrought; and not 
to let the poor Man thus expose himself to the World, in 
such a Quackish and Pedantick manner, by Publishing 
such Lese Majestie untruths; but I hope the Doctor for his 
own Safety (if ever hereafter he appears in Print) will 
retract this, as well as the rest of his bare-faced fallacies 
wherewith his Practical and Philosophical Scheme, is stuffed, 
least his persisting in such pernicious Courses bring upon 
him Condign punishment, as the Just reward of such ob- 
stinate Offenders. 
‘All Directions being fully answered and very plain; 
‘therefore if the Infection be but small, or newly got, one 
‘Pot or much less will cure you, if the foregoing Rules 
‘be but observed: For altho’ sometimes in highest Infections, 
‘the Patient may seem to be well with taking but about 
‘half a Pot; yet it ought to be continued for sometime 
‘longer, to carry off Intirely the Venom, and Malignity 
‘to prevent a Relapse. But when it has taken deep Root, 
‘then Persons sometimes Imagine (for some Persons will 
‘be deeply Infected even in Injuries in a few Days, according 
‘to the degree of Malignity received, whereas others shall 
‘have a slight Clap for several Months) but if the Use of 
‘3 Disappoint any one, in the Cure of the 1st and 2d
‘Stage, if Rules and Directions have been exactly observed; 
‘their Money shall be returned again if they have Ad- 
‘dressed themselves to the Author by a Letter before the 
‘Use of them all. 
‘Now as by any return of Money, which will not be 
‘under 3 Guineas, they must have the 3 Pots to shew forth 
‘(having a whole Month here allowed them for the taking 
‘of it, which quantity the bigness of three Cherry's, any 
‘Person may Take in less than 21 Days, if they have their
‘Cure 

(37)
‘Cure so at Heart, as to be serious about the matter) with 
‘all the Papers, Seals, and Directions, their Names that 
‘they gave themselves, while they bought it, and the Day 
‘when every one was bought, that Mr. Barnet, or Mr. Prat, 
‘may find them in their Shop-Books, wherein every Pot’s 
‘Name and Day Is Registred. 
‘Likewise declare upon the Word, Honour, and Reputa- 
‘tion of a Gentleman, that having taken the three entire 
‘Pots, and followed exactly and punctually all the Directi- 
‘ons, did not, using it a Day and finding Benefit by it, or 
‘left off for some Days together, or after they found them- 
‘selves well, did not continue for some time longer to root 
‘and carry off intirely the malignant Venom, to prevent a 
‘Relapse; neither did hinder the Cure by fast Living, or 
‘by any Venereal Act; then after all to give a Receipt to 
‘Mr. Barnet, or Mr. Prat, at the return of the three Gui- 
‘neas, for the Satisfaction of the Author, otherwise they, 
‘must be accountable for them; Compare this with his Pro- 
posal at the bottom of the 15th Page of his Practical and 
Philosophical Scheme, where he tells you, That his Specfick 
has always really perform’d what Others only pretend and 
‘promise; yet for the further Satisfaction to the Buyer, 
‘and to convince the World of the Author’s Integrity, If 
‘any Person within the space of 21 Days inclusively from 
‘their buying it, the Day of Sale being registred in the 
‘Shop-Book (not mentioning here the 1st and 2d Stages) 
‘shall come to the Shop where they bought it, with decla- 
‘ring on their Honour and Reputation, that having us’d 
‘the Specifick according to every Rule prescribed in the Di- 
‘rections, and find no Benefit by it, shall freely, without any 
Dispute, have their Money returned again. Price a Guinea. 
I suppose, by this time, the Reader is satisfied of the Au- 
thor’s Integrity, as he terms it; but what can be more dif- 
ingenious than what is obvious from this compar’d with the 
former, I leave the Reader to determine; for should the Pa- 
tient be restricted to take the three Pots in 30 Days, then 
the Doctor is sure the Patient will never come to demand his 
Money again, it being sufficient in that time, to kill any Man, 
for, as it is evident from the particular Directions to the 3d 
Stage, the Patient is to take nine Sweats, and six Vomits, 
which takes up 15 of the 30 Days: Then supposing every 
one of the three Pots to hold the bigness of 12 Peas, 
which it does at least, (the bigness of a Pea being the largest 
Quantity that is to be taken at a time) then these three Pots 
require 36 Days; so that all the Swears, Vomits, and Pur- 
ges, without intermitting one Day in the whole Time, re- 
quire 51 Days; and yet if the Patient takes not all these in 
30

(38)
30 Days (tho’ still without his Cure) he is to have no Money 
return’d again. 
After perusal of the Advertisements, (alledged to be In- 
certed by Persons, that had received their several Cures, from 
the Royal Specifick) I found them all in the same Stile and 
Strain with the Scheme it self; which Imprest me with a 
more than Ordinary belief, that they were of the Author’s 
own Inventing and composing; and that which confirmed 
me the more was, that I could not believe the most abject 
or Mercernary wretch in the Nation, could allow themselves 
to be so much exposed to the World, by publishing them- 
selves, Names and Places of abode, as receiving a Cure for 
that Distemper which is the bane of all Mankind; Unless 
their Extream Poverty (having received a bribe of the Au- 
thor) had laid them under a Necessity to attest such Falla- 
cies; yet for my own Satisfaction, I obtained the favour 
of two Gentlemen, upon whose Integrity, I could conside, 
to go to the several Places according to Directions in the 
Advertisements; and upon strict Inquiry found most of 
them to be Non-Entities or no such Persons living in those Pla- 
ces, there were indeed two or three poor Misfortunate People, 
who, after application to the Author of this Royal Specifck, 
besides their Loss of time and Money, thrown away after 
his Medicines were at last, obliged to go to Kingstand Hospi- 
tal &c. for their Cures. 
Now from all what has been observed concerning the 
Author’s Integrity, may we not, without breach of Charity 
conclude (he being by Religion, a Roman Catholick, and 
addicted to the worshiping of Images) that the very Day, 
he delivered his Sheets into the Hand of the Printer: Kneel- 
ed before the Alter of the Goddess Laverna, and made this 
or the like Supplication. 
—Pulchra Laverna!
Da mihi fallere, Da Justum Sanctumque Videri
Noctem Peccatis, et fraudibus objice Nubem.
Laverna fair, this Suit deny me nor, 
That I may lie and Cheat, and yet be thought 
A Man that’s Just; let not my Spots be seen, 
My Knavish frauds with darkness do thou Screen, 
I shall conclude by acquainting the Doctor, that as in this 
so in all my other Latin Sentences, I have taken care to Ren- 
der them, into Intelleglble English, to save him the trou- 
ble of running at every turn to his School-Matter with a 
Latin Verse, And if this Dish don’t relish with his Vitiated 
Pallate,


(39)
Pallate, I shall in a very short time present him with ano- 
ther Mess, that perhaps will please him worse, and because 
it may be a little strange to him, I’ll tell him beforehand 
its to be Intitled, the Renegado Whipt; wherein with 
Ore Retundo, I shall spell his Name out ad Longam, till then, 
I must bid him and the Reader farewell. 
POSTSCRIPT. 
TO fill up a blanck Page, and give the Readers further 
proof of the Author of the Royal Specifick his pro-
jecting Genius; I’ve hereto subjoyn’d his Royal Sauce as he 
calls it (so often advertiz’d in the publick Prints) 'Being 
‘as he says, the Essence of Oysters, Mushroomes, Anchoves, &c. 
‘a Spoonful of which with as much Vineger in Melted But- 
‘ter makes a most delicious Sauce, for either Fish or Flesh, 
‘&c. to be Sold at 12d. the Viol; at the Wheat.Sheas, 
‘against the Monument, at the Flower de-Luce against the 
‘Exchange in Cornhill, &c. for an Encouragement to those 
‘Gentlemen and others, that are willing to take 2 Dozen 
‘together, they shall have a Receipt given them Seal’d up, 
‘being one of the greateft Secrets in Nature, whereby they 
‘may draw the Fishes, contain’d in any River, to any part 
‘where they please; so any Ship Becalm’d at Sea may by the 
‘same Rule draw large quantities thereto of such Fishes as 
‘the Part affords, and no room to doubt catching them. 
Is it not discernable to the meanest Capacity, that the 
Doctor finding his Royal specifick to lose its Reputation, (being, 
as is already made appear, insufficient for the Cure of that 
Disease) therefore Proteus-like, he changes himself into so many 
different Shapes, and suffers so many Transmigrations or 
Transmutations, that it will be hard to know him if we 
should meet him in our Dish: Having first assum'd the Cha- 
racter of a Taylor, next a Barber, then a Baker, after that a 
Chymist, next a Doctor, and now last of all, he Dwindles 
down again into a Cook, to which he flies as his last Refuge 
or Anchora Spei; what can be more opprobrious, than for one 
that vainly assum’d the Character of a Physician, to degenerate 
into a Sauce-maker; which is an Indignity that requires a 
Lucan's Spirit, and pen to lay open and explode him. But 
after all that has been said, if People will rather Snore in 
the Lethargy of their Stupid Ignorance and unbelief; then 
awake to the Disquisition of Truth; and will not bethink 
them of applying to a far more generous, easie, safe, and 
exquisite Way, both to obtain and preserve their Healths
argues

(40)
argues a Coldness, Dulness and Dotage, little less than In- 
curable, or a stark Deadness, Contracted by the Opium, and 
Lethargy, of Epidemick Stupidity. 
Note, W. Wright, at the 5 Clogs, in Lemon Street, Good-  
mans Fields, so often advertis'd in Mr. Read's Weekly Journal, 
whom the Doctor (to purchase reputation to himself and his
Specifick Grain) says was cured of a Leprosie all ever his Body, - 
Imbred at his Birth 33 Years ago, by vertue of his Royal 
Specifick 
These are to Certify to the World, that I with a Gentle- 
man in Company with me, went to the above nam'd Wright, 
who, (because we pretended to apply to the Doctor for a Cure, 
Ingeniously told us) that the malady was not all over his 
Body, as was alledg'd in the Advertisement, but was only a 
a dry Scurf or Scab upon his Head and Face, which he contract- 
ed, about 16 Years ago, through hard drinking, and 
non-Application for a Cure of the Venereal Disease, he then had 
upon him; and altho' he was 33 Years Old, yet is it but 
16 Years, since he was Seised with that Distemper of which 
the Doctor says he is Cur'd altho he himself does much doubt 
of it, because the Stiffness, Numbness and debility of his Joints 
and Limbs, does still continue from all which we may plain- 
ly see, there is as much veracity in this, as in all the rest
of the Doctor's Advertising Vouchers. 
FINIS. 
THE Author's Business occasioning his Absence when it
was in the Press, the Reader is desired to Mend with 
his Pen, these few Escapes of the Printer. 
Page 7. Line 1. of the 2d Cap. for third read three. p. 8 l. 
23 for Salabrious v. Salubrious, p. 15. l. 1. for Specificks v. 
Specifick. l. 39. for Vestal v. Vestial. p. 16 l. 37. for shifting 
v. sisting. p.  18. l. 1. for this v. his. l. 15. v to be. p. 19. l. 7. 
for exhorbitant v. exorbitant. p. 23 l. 17 for United v. untied. 
p. 26. l. 1. for Observation v. Observations. p. 27. l. 1. for 
rest v. rests. p. 30. l. 9. for Point v. Pint, l. 28. for Point v. 
Pint, l. 34. for is v. as.