[United States Navy Training Film. Nonclassified. Copyright 1945 by Hugh Harman Productions, Inc.]
[Commandments For Health]
[Cleaning Mess Gear]
[A solider wearing an apron puts on a facemask]
You may not believe it, but this is really Private McGillicuddy!
[Washes hands and prepares an alcohol solution]
And his unusual activity is quite a surprise.
Facemask, rubber gloves, disinfectant - looks like he's preparing for an important operation.
And he is! He is going to wash his mess gear.
Although he is knocking himself out with all this surgical edict, there's good reason for it.
Mac is not taking any more chances.
So draw up a foxhole and we'll tell you why.
Once upon a time, McGillicuddy ignored the commandment:
[Fifth Commandment Mess Gear] "Thou shalt carefully and faithfully wash thy mess gear both before and after meals."
"For verily if thou become negligent in this habit thy guts shall be like knots in a wet rope."
So while the other men went through their usual routine of cleaning their mess gear in scolding hot soapy water,
McGillicuddy would stash his lazy butt under a coconut tree and wash his gear in his own way.
[Licks his mess gear, puts dirt inside his mess gear, shakes dirt around, wipes mess gear with his shirt, and his mess gear shines]
Sure, it looks clean - but it isn't!
You can't clean your mess gear by lickin' it!
You can't?
Naw, that just makes it look pretty! Here, look at it through this magnifying glass.
[Magnifying glass appears above mess gear and spots of food are seen for the first time]
You see those little spots? They're bits of decayed food - no telling how long they've been there!
Now watch closely.
[Isolated zoomed shot of decayed food. A lizard-like germ crawls out of food]
Cute ain't he? That, is a germ!
You ain't seen nothing yet. Take another gander.
[Looks back at germ]
Now watch him multiply.
[Germs continue to split into other identical germs]
2! 4! 8! 16! 32! 64! 128! 256...
[Narrator becomes inaudible as he continues to count even faster and then skips to final number]
8,970,562!
If you haven't been washing your mess gear properly, you've been eating those dirty microscopic scavengers!
[Looks sick and quickly runs and washes his mess gear in multiple scolding hot barrels of soapy water and finishes with a sigh of relief]
Well, that's more like it!
And that isn't all. You gotta wash it again before you eat.
Otherwise stray insects - like this fly for instance - will foul it up again!
Maybe he's just been to the privy, or maybe the garbage dump, and undoubtedly packed with dysentery germs.
[A fly with dirty dripping feet lands on mess gear and skates around, leaving behind a trail of dirt]
If you're not careful, McGillicuddy, you will be too!
[Is napping and is oblivious to the fly]
And what's more - hey ya knucklehead, wake up! I'm talkin' to ya!
There's a fly on your mess gear!
[Wakes up, swats fly away, and looks proud]
Now don't forget to wash that thing before ya eat.
[Trumpet sounds; runs off with mess gear]
[Runs pass soldiers washing mess gear and gets first in line for food]
That's right, Mac. First in line - last in brains.
Let him pile all that good wholesome food on top of those germs.
[Walks out of mess hall happily, when he suddenly holds his stomach in pain]
[X-ray view of guts; narrator's voice booms as guts are tied into knots]
Remember, Mac: "Thy guts shall be like knots in a wet rope!"
[Imagines himself in bed]
[Imagines a large monster-like doctor towering over him, about to cut into his stomach with a large knife]
[Imagines a sinister-looking doctor plunging his head with a toilet plunger]
[Imagines two surgeons sawing him in half with a saw]
[Imagines looking upwards and seeing a ring of grinning and snickering doctors]
[Imagines himself being forced to drink an extremely large bottle of Castor Oil]
[Imagines himself being held down with his bottom facing a doctor...]
[...holding a hose connected to a tank that says 'Capacity 50 Gal.' The tank empties into the hose and soldier screams in pain]
[Is seen washing his mess gear]
And so, kiddies, that is the story of Private McGillicuddy and the bad little germs, and how he learned to wash his mess gear and live happily ever after.
[The End. MN 2808 e. 1945]